Lately

A few things happened these days. Some expected, and some, not so expected.

I really thought that yesterday night would be my last lesson. But, last minute changes. I'm gonna continue, at least til the end of intermediate. Took me such a long time to think things over. I really was going to stop. But, it's hard to let go of something that I've been doing since before I could really speak. It's been like, 13-14 years? Yeah. I'm not ready to let go yet. And, I don't want to go back there someday and have some random girl standing next to me who says that she's gonna quit and I'll be like "WHY? DONT QUIT!" and the girl will be like "why?" and I'll be like "You'll regret. Trust me, cause I do". Nope. I don't want that to ever happen. No way. So, yeah. I ain't gonna stop. *smiles*

Anyway, I'm gonna tone down a lil in choir next year. Tone down as in no more competitions, extra practices and pres thingi. Why?

~ I made a deal with my mum. Yes, sacrifices.
~ SPM
~ I'm not sure if I can completely commit myself next year.

Oh, and I passed my my add maths with a B. Yays.

More things are gonna happen. It's just a matter of time. Oh wells, we'll just wait and see.

-Nic-

Dance, Dance, Dance

7th Aug

Had what would most probably be my last concert. It was amazing. A night to remember forever. I forgotten how much I enjoyed being onstage, dancing. I barely remembered the feeling of it all. Feeling nervous backstage before our turn, screaming and cheering like crazies, the audience clapping, everything. I'm really going to miss it all.

Performed in the Opening, Glitz and Glam, and the Finale. Had like, 3 inches think of make up on my face and a whole head of hairspray. I can't believe that this would be my last performance. After 13-14 years of dancing, this is the end. I can't even let go of 4 years of choir, but I'm actually leaving behind my so many years of dance experience. I'm going to leave the place that I partly grew up in.

By the way, I didn't really get lost on the way there. Godma was a lifesaver. Mum wanted to turn at every turning there is. If Godma wasn't there, I'll probably still be finding my way home now. Maybe I'll be in Seremban buying some food for those people. Oh, I also brought my Physics notebook along cause the map that my friends drew for me was at the back of the book.Heh. And, oh, See Yeng came with me to the concert! *BIG smile* Aunty Elsie had one extra ticket so, yeah. =)

And, all those who have danced with my through the years, I love you guys. You're such awesome people.

8th August

Took part in the Subang Parade Patriotic Choir Competition. Was supposed to be in school by 9am but I woke up only at that time. Hah. So much for being punctual. We won the 2nd place. First was DJ, 3rd was Seksyen 16 if I'm not mistaken. So, yeah. Congrats to everyone. =)

School tomorrow. I really prefer saturday school now cause it's so fun. Heh.

-Nic-

Same Ol', Same Ol'

So, after piano today, mum was like "so how's your results?" First thing that came into my mind was I SO did not not fail chinese! Of course, I didn't say that out loud. I haven't even told her yet. Ugh. Stinking chinese. Why does it have to be so freaking hard? I mean, Jane Austen's been dead for a couple of centuries but I still understand her old-fashioned english. I just don't get what chinese people meant in the olden days. It's just so confusing. First, I thought this person was hacking the other, but then, turns out it's the other person who's hacking this person. Confusing. Ugh. Good thing is, I passed my physics, history, maths and maybe add maths. *smiles* I sometimes feel that add maths is easier than maths and vice versa. Hah.

Anyway, mum popped the question again. "What are you going to do after this?" How was I supposed to answer that? I mean, hellooo? I'm the idiot here who changes my mind every few seconds. Okay, not seconds, I'm just exaggerating as usual. But, so far, I've stuck my mind on music. But then, medic suddenly sounds like a nice path. Not that I'm gonna go that way since I'll probably end up killing one of my patients by accident if I become a doctor. No way. I don't wanna get sued like MJ's doc. Still, being a pharmacist, nurse or a doctor is kinda cool. You get to save lives. Or maybe a marine biologist. I love dolphins. And, the underwater world looks really interesting and mysterious, not to mention pretty. I used to wonder where'd all those colourful stuff come from when I watched The Little Mermaid and I actually hoped that I'll see one someday. (Still hoping) Anyhoo, I just don't like the sharks cause each time I watch Jaws, I'd imagine myself being torn and eaten by that shark. But I read or saw somewhere that there's more dangerous creepy monsters down there waiting for the chance to grab some unlucky fella and gobble them up. Pfft.

So, once again, I'm facing the same problem. What am I really gonna do after this? I definitely don't wanna waste my time going to NS. I don't wanna be a soldier. Besides, I'm not really the work-out-like-mad kind of person. So, yeah. Forget it. Ezcema should be a good enough excuse to get me out of that shit if I'm really that unfortunate to be chosen. There's so many examples for me to follow in my family. I mean, there's the arts and there's the science people. I have relatives in the medic line who are really close to me, and some really really far. And by far, I mean Norway. Then, there's the arts, as in business, and music. But that one's in Canada. Business person is still here next to me. And then, there's the educators, who are like, the super patient kind of people. I'm not that patient, so asking me to teach a whole class of hooligans is probably just asking me to give then hell cause that's probably what I'd do especially when I'm in a bad mood. Not that I'd be a school teacher either, I don't want to be hated by a whole bunch of students cause when they hate you, they really hate you. Trust me. I'm one of them. So, what AM I gonna do? Any ideas? I'm like, turning 17 next year, which is SPM year, which is also the year where I should start deciding which path I should take, which is ALSO the year where I can legally drive. *big grins* Heh. Gosh, I seriously need to start thinking bout my future. *smacks bead*

Oh, btw, I hate the weather. It's damn freaking hot. I could probably put an aluminium foil on the ground and start cooking some chickens.

-Nic-

Blah

Abandoned my blog for such a long time. Gosh. Anyway, went to SK USJ 2 to help Nad with the carnival and stuff. Lesson learnt: never ever volunteer to help her, EVER.

Anyhoo, I've got good news. I FREAKING PASSED MY PHYSICS!! Lol. I'm just so happy that I passed. *grins* And, I passed my theory exam too. Yay. Been kinda busy these days. School, tuition, piano, ballet, choir, assignments and crap. Sighs.

I don't really have much to blog about actually. See how boring my life is? I'm just glad that exam's finally over and I can have some fun. I seriously need to go out. Like, seriously. And, oh. I finally watched Eclipse the other day. It was okay I guess. Not to say really bad, but, yeah. My heart didn't go thumping mad like the way it did in Twilight when I saw Rob Patt. He's just wayyy too pale now. It's like they over bleached him or something. Taylor was kinda hot, though his muscles are still huge to me. Creepy. And, Kristen's hair looks nicer this time. Lol. The new Victoria? Yeah, she's pretty. But she looks so innocent. If I didn't know, I would have thought that Riley was the mastermind behind everything that happened. Dakota's stunning as usual.

Okay, I'm tired now. Tomorrow's Nad's big day. So, yeah. I need to sleep. Nites!

-Nic-

Breathe.

Okay, my blog's like, totally dead. But I have a really really good reason. I've just been to busy thinking what I'm so busy about that I couldn't find time to blog at all. So, yeah. Anyway, hols are wayyy over. Sorry lah, no time to blog ma. So, what I did during the hols: eat, sleep, study a lil and rot.

School's already started for quite some time, tried catching up with the work I've abandoned for so long. So far, it's working a lil. At least I'm trying to do my bm and I'm doing more add maths now. So, holidays was okay for me I guess. Hectic and tiring, but, yeah. First week was MCE, then trinity exam and back to Juru for Grandma's 49 days thingi. Oh, and we got a distinction for our trinity exam. *smiles* AND, I got my ballet results back too, and am really REALLY happy with it. *double smiles*

Been kinda torn in between recently cause I have like such a huge dilemma. PDA concert, Faust and competition. I can't go for all of them because..

1) I can't split myself into 3 and I don't have a twin/triplets.
2) I just don't have enough time. I'm already dragging my AT exam to next year cause I haven't practiced enough. No way can I score good results if I take it this year. So, one year wasted. Sighs.
3) I'm tired of fighting with my mum over it. I've been fighting since form 1 and I'm sick and tired of it. You have no idea how much it hurts. Besides, mum's getting old. I can't fight with her forever and not think about her health.
4) It's my last performance. My last rehearsal. My last dance.
5) It's probably a once in a lifetime chance and I'm kinda throwing it away. Geez. I feel like I'm throwing a part of my body away and I'm never gonna get it back.

But, I think some of the problems are solved FOR NOW. I don't know what gonna happen in the future. And, they've left us. I'll miss them dearly. Hopefully they'll come back. And, oh, it feels kinda weird when I don't attend practices. I don't know why, but I just feel like something's missing. Hmm. Anyhoo, concert rehearsals are on. Hopefully everything's gonna be okay cause this concert will be a part of me forever. Well, at least that's what people usually say. The last dance is the one that remains forever. I don't know if I'll remember when I grow old and get Alzheimer's Disease cause I'm already so forgetful now although I'm just 16. Sighs.

By the way, I failed my add maths again. AND, physics. Wtf. How am I supposed to take my SPM like that? Die la. My studies really dropped like mad. Ish. Can't even score an 80 for english. I miss primary now. Sobs.

-Nic-

Doopedywhoop

I'm actually just trying to see if it works. Using my phone to blog now cause I accidentally found out that I have access to internet. So, yeah.

-Nic-

.

Just a quick one for now cause it's almost 2 and I'm still sitting here. Anyway, I never get bored of this song. He's amazing. Such nimble fingers. It's like they're alive. Gosh.

Think he's awesome? I do. Listen to this kid play.

And to think that he's only 7. Gosh. I just started playing the piano when I was 7 and he's like, WOW. Anyway, nites. everyone. =)

-Nic-